Is the bible for your own interpretation

Time and time again religion will continue to be the most controversial to be brought up. Each person views a higher power in a different way depending on their surroundings, who they spend their time with and how they were raised. One person's views can be radically different than anothers and the hard part is you can never figure out who's "right." Being a chiristian i understand that there are many things about my faith that i don't understand. When i get to heaven God will hear a long list of the things i wish i could make sense of right now but i don't have the wisdom or understanding to do so. The most controversial questions seem to be contradicted sometimes throughout scripture, from the old testament to the new the views of "the law" are very widespread. So how to you know what to believe? As a christian how do you live in this secular world and still have a heart for God?
Taking everything the bible says literally have gotten many people into some funny beliefs. For example; "Do not cook a young goat in its mother’s milk," Exod. 34:26; "Do not wear clothing woven of two kinds of material," Lev. 19:19; "Make tassels on the four corners of the cloak you wear," Deut. 22:12).1
We as Christians violate a number of Old Testament laws everyday(e.g., "A woman must not wear men’s clothing, nor a man wear women’s clothing," Deut. 22:5; "Rise in the presence of the aged," Lev. 19:32; "The pig is also unclean; although it has a split hoof, it does not chew the cud. You are not to eat their meat or touch their carcasses," Deut. 14:8) to name a few. So why don't we keep these laws? Trying to make sense of this i've found that Jesus gave these laws to people at the time becasue they were causing them to sin. He called them to be respectful and pure just like he calls us today. When he came to die for our sins we stopped neeing to be bounded by rigid laws and practices and became free to worship him and (desire) to please him made us holy. Laws are in place as guidelines on how to live a good life although if God did not show us grace we'd all be in a lot of trouble. It's a tricky subject matter to get to the bottom of but in my opinion God knows your heart. More than following strict guidelines and be morally perfect God wants someone who longs for him to be apart of their lives. You can lead a perfect life but if you have not relied on God as your savior you haven't caught onto his heart. This is good news becasue i am constantly making mistakes and i need grace every day and every minute. But if God see's every sin as the same what makes speeding and murdering different in his eyes? Technically a sin is a sin but some sins are worse than others. God see's sinning as bad no matter what but speeding is not intentionally harming God's creation, murdering is. I can't really answer this other than giving my best wisdom. I think God is after your heart. If you do and say all the right things but have a impure and anxious heart God wants to help you. Sin is apart of the fall. We are inately born with it and although i will never stop sinning i will never stop asking for help either. Just a thought for the day..

Through your wounds we are healed

The title of my blog is the "Joyful Journey," reffering to the joyful encounters we have on our way through life. Although sometimes your jounrey can seem anything but joyful. Pain, waiting, confusion, addiction, fear ect. all hinder us from continuing on a joyful path.
One of the biggest questions i believe people have about the bible is why God puts us through suffering? If he is indeed a loving God why doesn't he just take away all the pain we ever go through, isn't he powerful enough for that? Of course he is. To my understanding God doesn't cause our pain or addictions, the devil does. He aims to minipulate, decieve and destroy us and our image of our loving creator. He does a pretty good job fooling us that our lives our under control when in reality they are falling apart.
In the midst of adversity it is hard to think that this pain is somehow going to work out for our ultimate good. God uses eachday whether we feel hopeless or not to shape us into being stronger, and more steadfast in him. If we choose we can grow in the process of being broken. Heartbreak and weakness has a strange way of strnthening us and God is faithful for those who are willing to wait. Waiting has become sort of an anomoly in our day-in-age. We are a tomorrow centered society, that in itself can be a little depressing. We never seem to focus on this moment or this chapter of our lives becasue we are so eager to get to the next best thing that will bring us happiness.
Pain is horrible, it's confusing and uncomfortable, but somehow we were called to suffer. Peter writes; " Becasue christ suffered for you, leaving an example, that you should follow in his steps." (1 Peter 2:22) It isn't pleasent or sugarcoated to feel like we are called into a life of suffering. Pain is everywhere; relationships bring pain, loss, addictions, jobs, family and everyday life but God wants us to remember him in the midst of that.
King David in (Palsm 142) is a good example when he is stuck in a cave he cries, vents and tells God how angry he is for his situation. Similarly we should be able to do this, God loves to hear our hearts but often times i want to give God the respect i believe he deserves so i keep it inside. The funny part about that is God knows whats on my heart, nothing is held in secret from him. David wonders why and how he can live another day in this cave and cries to God to give him the strength to withstand it. But every moment he was in there God had a reason for it. He didn't save David from his dispaire until he knew he was ready. David is a good example becasue even though he was king at one point, he was brought down into the depths of hopelessness and choose to trust in God and continually prayed to him. He didn't quit, give up or runaway even when it seemed like the better opyion. Somehow God used this pain to teach him lessons of strengethening and brought him out of it a renewed man. When David switched his focus from trying to get out of the cave to asking God what he could learn while he was in it God used him and raised him up. I don't believe i am far from David.
I constantly wonder through less joyful seasons wondering when they will be over. I plan for tomorrow in hopes that i can run from the cave and the lessons God wants to teach me. Being molded and shaped is a hard process. Flowers are cut back to look almost dead so that in the spring they will regrow more beautiful than before. Through seasons of being like David we have a choice to stay and be cut back for a moment so that we canb become more like Jesus or we can run. Most of the time running seems more appealing and staying feels like your persistance prayers fall on deft ears, but God isn't deft to your cries. In Psalms it says that when you cry out to God, he stops everything and turns to you. He wants to help you, he sets his time aside to listen to just you and to communicate with you. If that doesn't restore confidence in my heart i dont know what will.
So even when your path seems at a deadend and you want to think about tomorrow remember (1 Peter 5:10) "The God of all grace who called you to his eternal glory in Chirst, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and stgeadfast." I dont know about you but i could use a lot more of that at times. I'll leave you with this quote from Mother Teresa; "Yesterday is gone, tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin."

Think what you want

Everyone has their own opinion on your life. You can try and ignore the fact that everyone has something to say about the way your living your life but the fact is your never going to be doing everything right to make everyone happy. Perfection is a monster and striving to appear perfect to others can drain you. Too many times i have been concerned about what others might think of my decisions. This fear has made me choose to do things that dont truley make me happy. Nobody can judge you or make you unhappy without your concent so therefore i want to try something new. Not caring could be the best thing and understanding that your mistakes make you stronger. The opinions on others can only affect you as much as you let them and living your life to the best of your ability is all you can do.
I think you have to get to a point in this life where other people stop affecting you and you can step back and realize that those who really love you will not judge you harshly. In my relationships, and decisions i have been afraid that others will judge what i do. In these next upcoming months i have begun to realize that caring too heavily about what others think can be exhausting and not worth the effort. Knowing yourself, your relationship and your goals you can live for yourself without the stress of what others will think haunting you. I want to make decisions fully aware that i will be judged no matter what i choose but at the same time finding peace in letting people think what they want.

From the inside out

You've heard it a thousand times before, beauty is skin deep. Our mom's have always told us that its what inside that matters most. If this is true why do so many of us strive to look so good on the outside while dying on the inside. Our pain isn't skin deep. We can smile and put on the best act in the world but no matter how hard we try our lives will never be truley beautiful until we are georgeous from inside out. This has become really apparent to me lately.
The world is obsessed with georgeous, skinny, successful people. You will make it far in life if you have those three qualities. Sadly genuine, faithful, and steadfast are looked over and only the stongest survive. Our hearts are ignored for outter beauty that people go great lengths to achieve. My life has been far too long focused on looking good on the outside and wondering why i feel an empyness. Focusing on yourself only emphasizes the areas you come up short and makes you wonder why you cannot be perfect. The image of perfection is a dangerous addiction that will drive you crazy to try and reach. Im slowly healing from that addiction and realizing that in my weakness Jesus is strong. In the areas i cannot fill my God is there to overflow. Lies of the enemy are available without end. Lies plastered on magazine covers, airbrushed models, self-help books all offering a quick fix. I'd like a quick fix but realize that this addiction to being perfect did not happen overnight. It's been a series of lies that i have given up my control to. Being out of control and unhappy inside makes the most georgeous person ugly. I want to be pretty, stunning and beautiful. But the difference is i dont want to become that way with make-up or a trip to the salon. I want to become beautiful, steadfast, and genuine from the inside out.

Oh, it is love?

Happy Valentines Day to all my fellow hopelessly romantic girls out there! This day usually stirs up a mix of emotions in most people. Many love this season for the fact that no matter who's in your life every store comes out with delicious chocolates or tasty holiday treats. Man or not you can always rely on a good truffle to satisfy your cravings for just a moment. Right after the new year every stores hang up red and pink decor and heart shaped objects become sprinkled amongst the shelves.

Thinking back to where i was last year on this very same day it shows me how much can change and how grateful i am to God to be led where i am now. Last year i was going to school and working at a nice upscale restaurant. It was a flood of happy couples all flocking to celebrate this one day of love. Don't get me wrong, like i said earlier i love romance, yet i do have a little chip on my shoulder for this chalked up hallmark holiday. Taking one day where the pressure is on to "show" or buy someone things in order for them to feel loved is ridiculous. I enjoy any excuse to get someone a gift, or plan something creative but the cliche of dinner, jewelry, flowers and a box of candy is a little much. Instead i like to do things a little less traditionally and perhaps create this day into something more personal.

This year i had the pleasure of spending it with someone very dear to me. Since last year i have moved about three times between going to YWAM, back home for the summer and now residing in chicago. I have been taken on a crazy and fantastic journey that has led me to a place i never could imagine myself living before, yet love has made me unable to want to be anywhere but right where i am right now.

God led me to a a guy who i can truly be myself around and call my bestfriend. Thinking back on all i've been through since last February 14th i see how much God has shown me his unconditional love through my boyfriend. I get a little glimpse of God's love by the way i am loved by him. This Valentines day i was really shown what it's all about. We stayed in for dinner and did brunch instead. We traded hallmark cards and flowers for some homemade fondue and a night in. I got the most amazing present from him and mostly i felt loved. I felt loved for who i am and what i have to give right now, i love that.

Again, for all my hopeless romantic girls out there. Take a look at this day as a marker. think about where you were last year and then think to this year. You might notice that what was a struggle last year isn't anymore yet those problems have been replaced with new ones. The problems will always be there, im learning this on a daily basis. There is no green grass, just grass you put more time into fertalizing and you will never be happy until you notice the love all around you. Put down the truffles and boxes of chocolates and if you remember anything, remember that no matter what man you have in your life God is head over heels in love with you. I just feel like i got blessed beyond what i deserve with someone i can love and that shows me God's love through the way he is pacient, kind, funny and treats me better than i could ever ask. i am in awe everyday at the way my life has been heading and i wake up everyday wondering how i got so lucky. its a good feeling.

Everyone's an addict

You see it all the time "How to live a better life" "How to loose those last 25lbs" "How to give up control"..ect. There is a book, show, pill or cure for everything nowadays. I have come to the conclusion that many of us have addictions that we dont care to admit. Everyone has something that is hard to give up, whether you struggle with control, being a workaholic, lazyness, eating too much or too little, self esteem, always needing someone ect we all have issues that instead of dealing with them head on we chose other things to fill their place. All of our baggage is easier to look to something that distracts us instead of facing the fact that we are broken in some form. It's easier to hide being our work than to face the fact that we have insecurities about being successful, it's easier to work out than deal with the fact that life's issues can get tough, it's easier to drink away the pain than to recognize we have been hurt. Even good addictions can take a nasty turn if we dont pay close attention to what we're hiding behind. Working out for example is something great until it become how you deal with your troubles. Working hard at your job is respectable until it becomes how to measure your success in life. To my knowlege we all have ghosts in our closets and things from our past that casue us to hide instead of going through the painful work to heal. In that case we all are addicts of some type. Some addictions are looked down on more than others but when it comes down to it we all use masks to hide our pain in fear of letting people know we have a weakness. But in our weakness we can heal.

Let it snow, let it ice, let it stop

It's been three days and I haven't seen the outside world in what feels like forever. Chicago experienced the third worst snowstorm it's had since the 60's. On thuesday night we got pounded by over 20 inches of snow and experienced a thunder and lightening storm in the middle of the icy flakes falling to the ground.
My school got cancelled both Tuesday and Thursday and nearly everyone had a snowday off work on Wednesdsay. I remember the snow storms in Oregon and how they would close the schools for a mere 2-4 inches and if it ever got much below 30 degreese it was basically deemed the next "ice age." Going from the northwest to the midwest winters is a huge shock and a reality check with how calm the northwest can be.
Tonight i get to shovel my car out of the icy snow that by now is about two feet deep in it. Hopefully it hasn't frozen too badly! The roads are now mostly clear although many people are still taking the train and bus for precationary measures. I got a horrible head cold coming home from Oregon and being stuck inside hasn't been the best cure. I have been blowing my nose every few minutes and know that another good day of rest and some good medication will do me some good. Now that the storm has past i can venture out into the slightly brisk negative 2 degree weather! Wish me luck